Wintery Thoughts in Autumn

Sometimes we take some time to think things over, to see where we are, what we’ve achieved and what is yet to do.
I’ve been experiencing this for quite a while now.
My love and I want to move our relationship forward, we want to live together, start our own life in our own place.
We already know where we want to live, what kind of appartement we’re looking for and how we would decorate it.
But it’s only when you set a goal -in this case: start saving so we can live together in this and a year or so- that you realize how hard it ‘ll get…

I earn less money than I’d thought
I’m currently experiancing medical problems which I need to pay for
I still have debts to my love
I need to pay my car of to my parents and such…

September isn’t even over yet
and I’m pretty much out of money.

Things just don’t seem to go according to plan.

I want to set as much money aside as possible
But bills keep catching up on me.

I do not intend to give up though, I WILL save enough money to live with my love
because there’s nothing I could ever want more.

Even if I can’t buy fancy new clothes no more
Even if I can’t go to exciting places
My priorities are different now

He’s my biggest priority
our life together is.

Sometimes one needs to back up a little, take a little break so you can see the big picture better.
I know where my heart lies
I know what I want
and I know I can do it.

Life is for the dreamers that decide to make their dreams come true.

It’s very possible that we might not live together in about a year
but I know that we’ll get there, eventually.
And the harder we need to work for it, the more rewarding it ‘ll be.
I just need to do my very best and be patient.

I Believe In Fairytales

I believe in fairytales, true love and magic.
I need it.
I need to believe in it, because sometimes it’s the only thing keeping me healthy.
Alive.

It’s what I know, it’s what I believe.
It’s safe, familiar.
It’s my escape when all hope is gone.
It saves me.
Sometimes, it’s the only thing that even makes sense to me. 
My safe fantasy world.
A place where I can truly be myself.
Home. 

I need to believe that there’s a better world somewhere, filled with magical, wonderful things.
Every night I close my eyes and I go back to that place.
Where I’m loved, welcomed.
Where I’m not the outsider, just for once.

Where everyone has their own kind of magic, whether as a fairy, a mermaid, a vampire, a princess or someone with special powers.
Where unicorns and other mystical creatures run free. 
It’s a world where Narnia, Middle Earth, Wonderland, Utopia, Atlantis, Neverland, the kingdom of Oz, … 
all come together.

A home for everyone.