This is something I often tend to forget.
But it’s true.
It starts with you.
It all starts with you, with what YOU want.
What YOU need.
With your dreams.
I know it’s hard sometimes to believe in yourself
I know the world can be a hard, cruel, heartless place.
Believe me, I do.
But as long as we stand together,
and united fight against all the bad thoughts,
the bad people.
As long as we believe in ourselves.
We can make it.
I’ve no doubt about that
“Christmas lights” by Coldplay was playing as she was hanging christmas balls in the tree.
Her eyes were sparkling with joy.
She danced across the room, admiring the strings of little lights hanging by the windows.
The little candles which spread a small but warm fire.
Cosiness was all around the room.
The scent of cinnamon filled the air.
A mistletoe was hanging above the door.
Big presents with a ribbon over it were stocked underneath the christmas tree.
Her fingers slide over them, eager to open them.
She closed her eyes as she heard the song play in the back.
Two strong arms reached for her from behind and held her in a warm, comfortable hug.
“Merry Christmas my love” a male voice whispered in her ear.
She turned around, with a big smile on her face.
“Merry Christmas to you too my dearest, and what a great Christmas it will be”
It was a cold, freezing night.
As she walked down the hill, following the path she could see her own breathe.
Her fingers were cramping, they were freezing.
She kept walking down, faster and faster, to keep herself from freezing.
A single tear was streaming down her face.
It was a hot tear running down her cheek.
She didn’t wipe it away.
She simply accepted the fact that she was hurt.
More than she had thought before.
She stopped by the little bridge as she looked over the board, watching the water follow it’s path.
Make it’s way through the green land.
Searching for it’s way.
Yet peacefully flowing.
She heard footsteps behind her.
It was him.
He stretched his arms and reached out for her to pull her in his arms and hug her.
She pulled back.
“Just let me…” she mumbled.
He was confused and didn’t know what to do.
“I just need you to answer my question.
If you can’t, or you don’t want to, I’ll have to make a conclusion.”
He didn’t answer, he simply stood there.
“That’s clear enough.” She said
and she started walking the other way.
She didn’t stop, just kept walking.
More hot tears started to roll down her cheeks.
She didn’t mind that much, they kept her face warm.
Her eyes started to hurt as the cold was getting worse.
She was standing all by herself on a little bridge.
Watching the water.
Trying to get her heartbeat down.
It took a while before he went after her.
“Love…will you just please go back to the house with me?
It’s freezing out here.”
“No, I want to stay here.”
“Because I don’t know where to go to.” She answered him.
“I can’t go back home, and I don’t know if I can go back with you.
I don’t even know if I want to stay with you. Not like this.
I think that maybe… we need some time apart.”
She choked on the last five words.
There was a silence coming from his side.
“But I don’t want to…” he softly spoke.
“Neither do I , but I think it’s best. At least for now.
She said and slowly turned around, walking back in the other direction.
There was a deafening silence.
The only sound she could hear, was her heart breaking.
And what a loud
and painful sound that was…
Reading this it made me realize that life’s way too short.
So take a chance, take a risk.
It’s better to try and fail than never try at all.