I Am Grateful

I am grateful…

… for all the great friends that I have. I may not have a whole group of friends, but the ones I do have I know I can count on.
… for my amazing boyfriend. The past year has been hard on us from time to time, for us individually and as a couple. But we made it. We’re still happily together and working to keep it that way. I love him so much.
… for all the people that have supported me throughout the year, which I needed very much every now and then.
Thank you for making me believe in myself again, when all hope was lost.
Thank you for picking me up when I was falling down.
… for all the followers, viewers and visitors of this blog.
As some may know, I was thinking about closing and deleting the blog, since I was getting bullied because of it, behind my back.
But it’s thanks to your sweet comments, your likes, your following that the blog is still here.
It’s because of you guys, not because of me.
You have no idea how happy every sweet comment -no matter how small- makes me.
So thank you.
So very much
… for all that I have accomplished the past year. I’m doing something I really love and I do everything I can to make it.
I want to succeed.
And even though it sure has cost blood, sweat and tears, it’s all worth it.

But most of all: I’m grateful to be alive.
And healthy.

And I’m grateful that I’m on the edge of living just another year more.

L.O.V.E

Love.

Such a powerful word.
So strong.

Love can be fierce.
Passionate.
Strong.
Controlling.

It can be scary.
It can make you feel crazy.
Makes you lose control.

Because it’s not something that yours to control in the first place.
We fall in love.
It happens naturally.

It makes you feel all kinds of things, things you want to express and share with others.
But at the same time, it makes you speechless.

It brings out the best
and the worst in you.

It can make you hurt like hell
or float as if you’re in heaven.

But in the end
when you meet the right person
it’s worth it all.

Love Like Theirs

Ever since I was a little girl, I’ve dreamt of a fairytale love.

When I was a teenager I was really into “One Tree Hill”.
Lucas Scott and Peyton Sawyer were my two favorite characters on the show.
I was so jealous of their love, their romance and I swore to myself that that was the kind of love I’d want to have someday.
The way they are a combination of best friends and lovers.
The way they tease each other.
How much they love each other.
The crazy but oh so fun things they do together.
The way they always support each other.
The fact that they’ve known each other for years and first became friends before they dated.
The fact that they’ve been on a few dates, but still it took them some time to really get together.

And it’s only now when I’m watching Season 6 of One Tree Hill once more, that I realize something.

I have that kind of relationship.
I too have known him for almost two years before we got together, even though we’ve been on a date before.
I too have dated an other guy in the period between our first date and the start of our relationship.
Even weeks, days before we got together I was still seeing an other guy.
I too had to make a choice, but in the end it was so obvious to me that it had always been him.
That he was the one. 

We too love to tease each other.
We too love to “fight” each other.
We love to challenge each other.
We look like two best friends and lovers all wrapped into one.
We are always together.
We’re inseparable.
You’ll most likely see him next to me. 

We too do the craziest things together.
We too like to go with the moment.
Live life as it comes.
We always support each other.
We know what the other one is thinking simply by sharing a look.
We too had our ups and downs, our doubts, our painful moments
but in the end we still choose to stay together. 

I’ve always wanted a relationship like Lucas and Peyton, 
and it’s only now I realize: 
I do.