The Final Countdown- The Road To Love

At last, the family crisis here at home seems to be solved.
Mom and dad are talking to each other again and there staying together, or at least for now.

Also, they’ll be going on vacation at last.
Which means that I’ll have the house all to myself for almost three and a half weeks.
Which means that my love is going to move in with me for three weeks and after my parents, brother and sister are back home, his parents ‘ll have left, along with his youngest brother.
So I’ll be able to live with him for about two weeks as well.
Which means that we’ll be living together for about five weeks in total.

I’m really counting the days.
The rest of my family is going to leave Wednesday night.
I’m counting the days…

I’m in a desperate need of the peace and quiet that hangs around the house whenever I’m home alone.
And even more now that I know that my love ‘ll be home.
Of course, I’ll be working all day, but maybe I could change that and work a little more night shifts?
It’s an idea.
That way I can stay up later in the evening and I get to stay longer with him in the morning.
Maybe even have breakfast together, or wake up together.

Of course, that would make it harder to prepare dinner when I come back home in the evening.
It’s just an idea, first I need to see what is possible and what would be best.

I kinda hate the fact that I’ll be working at my internship…
I’d rather stay at home and constantly spend time with him.
Although I enjoy our moments even more know that I don’t hear him during the day.
Makes me count the hours till I see him again even more.

We already started to make plans.
What we’ll do, what we’ll eat, …
For example, we’re going to do a cheese and wine evening.
Probably on a Friday evening.
Or in the weekend.

Who knows, maybe I’ll finally see his more romantic side?
A girl can dream, right?

Anyway, work or no work, it’s going to be great.
I just know it.
We’re going to have a great time, no doubt.

I’m counting the days till then…

I’m so looking forward to falling asleep in his arms at night 
and waking up in his arms in the morning.
To go buy groceries with him on Saturday’s.
To live our own life in my house.
To do whatever we want whenever we want.

I’m so looking forward, to all of it.


What Are You Now?

You have no idea what you’re doing to me, to us.
I wonder if you really even care.
You just go ahead, making decisions on your own, not knowing how much they affect every other life in this house.
You simply don’t care, or you’re just too stubborn to see.
I see you walking around, sometimes I even hear you.
But you’re nothing more than a ghost, living in this house.
Sometimes you make your presence known, but that’s all there is.
You don’t do any of the tasks you’re supposed to do anymore, you simply are.
But what you are right now, I don’t even know.


Life Changing Decisions – Bye Bye Life…

You know , sometimes we think we got life all figured out.
We’re happy with the life that we’re living.
We know that it isn’t perfect, but we’re happy with what we have.

Well, so was I.
My life wasn’t perfect but I was happy.
I have a great boyfriend who lives only three streets from here, my friends are the best, …

And then all of that changed.
I can’t really tell what it is though, because I promised to keep it in the family.
But it’s just so big that I simply can’t keep it in.
So I told my boyfriend, whom is also pretty much my best friend and guardian angel.

It was something my parents told me, my sister and brother.
It caused some pretty bad reactions.
People started crying.
I, being the eldest of the children, took care of my brother.

If what they said is really going to happen, which I’m terribly afraid for, it will changes all five of our lives.
Nothing will be the same.
And only now, I realized that it would also affect my relationship with my love.
In a bad way.

My world would just come crashing down.
It would burn to ashes.
And there’d be nothing that I can do about it.

I’m just helplessly, powerlessly watching from the side.
Afraid, terrified of what might happen.
Of what the results might be.
I’m desperately trying to find out what’s going on.
Trying to find another way.
A milder one.

I fear for the cause.
I really do…
And I can’t stop these tears from coming…


The End Is Near

Struggling, crawling, crying,…
it’s a hard fight.
A though fight.
A real battle.
It’s war.
And many have lost their lives.
Many couldn’t handle the pressure.
They gave into the dark.
But the end is near.
All the blood, tears and sweat I spilled are going to be rewarded.
The end is near.


Thank god the exams are almost over! 😉