Sometimes I wonder… 

Sometimes I spend my days wondering, worrying.  Trying to understand why it seems that bad things always seem to happen to good people. From time to time it really baffles me.

I know of so many couples that always did and do their best to be there for everyone, always share the little things they had, were always there when anyone needed them, lived humble, work(ed) hard,…  and yet bad things keep happening.

To be more personal, my fiancé and I are in the same situation.

We both work hard, I combine working and studying at a university -which, I’m not going to lie, is really hard- to give us a better future, to give future children of ours a better future. I do my own household, try to cook on a daily basis, be a good daughter, daughter-in-law, granddaughter,… but my days just seem to flash by without me even realizing what happened. My days seem to be too short for all the things that need to be done.

And then my fiancé got fired from his job… he has been sitting at home since the  15th of December….

meanwhile other things have happened, unexpected costs, and we are trying our very best to plan a budget friendly wedding, seeing what we can do ourselves,…

But to be honest… it’s a really hard time. It has been even before my love lost his job…

I’m doing my very best, we both are but sometimes it all just seems to slip through my fingers and everything seems so unfair.

Even though this whole post might seem sad, I remain hopeful. Things will get better. I’m confident in that.

It’s only a matter of time, and effort. But I can do this, we can do this. We will get through this.

– Britt

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9 thoughts on “Sometimes I wonder… 

  1. I know the feeling. I have been unemployed properly since 2015 and am trying to find work but things keep falling through. I am now having to try and get some money fundraised to be able to attend my family events this year which would mean the world to be. Did I also mentioned last year (at the age of 30) was diagnosed with early onset arthritis and straight spine. I didnt even get to celebrate my 30th because I was unemployed and didnt want to put anyone out 😦 Life really does kick you in the ass but I am still helping people out no matter what 🙂 I will help anyone out if I can even though my life is rather crap right now 🙂

    1. It sure sounds like you’ve been having a really hard time yourself … have you looked for help to find a job? some guidance program or such? We have those kind of things here in Belgium that we can request.
      arthritis and straight spine, those are really difficult physical diagnoses to live with… especially at your age (my boyfriend is 30 as well). I hope you have medication that helps with the pain?

      life does kick you in the ass…
      and like I said: sometimes it makes me sad that it seems to be the best people that get kicked the most…
      the gentle, kind , hardworking ones.
      But then again, the others might just not care enough to suffer, or are simply more stronger and adaptable. Or have rich families that can help through money or by pulling strings… I don’t know.

      I am very happy to read that you still help other people out no matter what though, I always love and admire those kind of people.
      The ones that don’t have plenty, but still share.
      You are one of the few that make the world a better place, just by being in it.
      And I thank you for it 🙂

      1. Thank you for your kind words. Though i have much on my plate some of the stuff i dont advertise much because i do not think that I should bumm everyone out with how truely bad things have been. But I will always help someone in need. I set up a gofundme page and actually feel so guilty about it as it feels like begging and i know people have worse troubles then I x best advice i ever heard is when your going through hell, KEEP GOING. Well im going through hell right now I just need the strength to keep going but it is hard at times x thank you for your kind words though x

      2. I know how you feel when you say that you think it will bumm people out, which is why I wrote my post “For all my lovelies” today with a newly made mail address in it.
        I know how it feels to have things on your plate and being afraid to talk about them because you think it might upset people.
        But I willingly and knowingly give the option. I won’t be bummed out and will do my absolute best to help, in any way I can.

        I know your gofundme page feels like begging, but the right people will understand why you do it, just like I do.

        that’s through: keep going, and don’t look back, only forward. The past is a lesson we have to learn from. The future is a blank page we can write with our own stories.

        your very welcome, everybody needs some kind words from time to time.
        Take them in, and cherish them.

        There is more where they came from 🙂

      1. I am going through some pretty rough times to yes, but then again my life has never been quite easy. I try to make the best of it though, and do what I can. With my daily life, my work, my social studies… I’m even thinking and looking things up about starting my own practice, as a therapist.

        I’m sure I will get back -or at least more- on my feet. And I’m sure things will get better for you as well. I’m rooting for you!

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