A Spark Of Hope

Tonight I went over to my boyfriend’s place again, like I do every Tuesday.
I have dinner there and go to his practice with him.
Right when we were about to leave for practice, he checked his Facebook and saw that he didn’t have any.
That there were too few people.

So we decided to go ‘out’, we drove to the town nearby, took a walk around the neighborhood until we both got way too cold and decided to go into his favorite café.
The café where we had been on our very first date as well.
We brought back those memories, talking about it as he bought me my favorite drink when I’m cold: a hot chocolate with whipped cream.

We talked and talked and talked…
It was heaven.
It really was.
Not that we don’t talk enough, we constantly talk, but this was different.
We got to talk about what’s “wrong” right now.
About us.
Our plans.
Before we had left, I had gotten all sad again in his room, telling him that I found we had been boring lately.
That we got into some kind of routine.
That I felt trapped, being home for over a month.
I felt bored.
Barely alive.

In the café, I also confessed to him that I miss Ghent a lot.
I miss seeing other people.
I miss the warm sunny days in Ghent when everyone would go to the Citadel Park near school, where we’d just sit and enjoy the sun.

Sometimes, there would even be musicians playing in the garden house.
We would get pizza, kebab or french fries nearby and go and eat them in the park.
Or we would go to the Saint-Peters Square and sit in the sun.
Or visit the beautiful garden that’s located there.
Or have a drink at the bowling place.
Yes, life was good back then.

And I miss Ghent.
A lot.
All of it.

It felt good to talk about all of that with him.
It felt like we both needed that.
And as we sat there, talking, smiling, laughing, drinking…
I fell in love with him all over again.

When we were still at his place, I told him that maybe we shouldn’t see each other for a couple of days.
That I would die because I’d miss him, but that maybe we would break the routine that way.

But sitting in the café, there was not a single part of me that wanted to be separated from him.
I needed him.
Always have.
Always will.

Yes, tonight was a good evening.
I just wish we could’ve spend the night and morning together as well.
It broke my heart to tell him goodbye for the night.
I hope that soon I won’t have to anymore…

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