I’m A Mess

“Oh, I’m a mess right now
Inside out
Searching for a sweet surrender
But this is not the end

I can’t work it out
How going through the motions
Going through us

And, oh, I’ve known it for the longest time
And all of my hopes
All of my words
Are all over written on the signs
When you’re on my road
Walking me home, home, home, home, home

See the flames inside my eyes
It burns so bright I wanna feel your love, no
Easy baby maybe I’m a liar
But for tonight I wanna fall in love
And put your faith in my stomach”

- Ed Sheeran – I’m a mess


ed sheeran 

Battle Of The Heart

I’ve shed so many tears
that I’m simply not capable of crying any more.
I’ve died so many times
more than I can remember.

There were nightmares
but none of them were real, ’till I woke up all by myself.

There’s a war going on in my head
a fear and anger raging in my heart.
Which one do I listen to?
Which do I believe?

I need to know if this is worth my battle
if there’s a chance that I can get you back
if there’s a way that you can change
back to how it used to be.

I need to know that I’m enough
that I’m what you want
so fight for me 
and proof it to me.

I need to know
I need to feel
I need to hear
I need to see.

So show me
‘Cause I need to know
before I die once more
Because I might not come back this time.


Make me whole again, because you’re the only person that can.

How Did We Get Here?

How did we get here?
In this dark place where we don’t talk
or kiss
or even share a look.

How did we get here?
In this place where we can’t seem to find one another.
So close and yet so far.

How did we get here?
We meet up, acting like nothing’s wrong when people are around
waiting to crash down when we reach a more private setting.

How did we get here?
Pretending not to love each other?
Pretending not to care?

How did we get here?
Do we not love each other then? Isn’t it enough?
Why did we get here?

And will we ever get back
to where we used to be?
To where our love was real and everlasting


When a heart’s broken, so is the person it belongs to.


Whisper In The Ear

A look.
A touch.
My heart stops beating.

A kiss
tender as ever
a breeze on my cheek.

A scent in the air
A whisper in my ear
A hand on my back.

A hand caressing my skin.
Another one caressing my hair

Your words in my ear
My heart skips a beat
My body’s screaming

“I want you”


Update Of A Busy Girl’s Life

Hey Guys

It’s been a long time since I properly wrote something, I know and for that I’m sorry but as some of you may know; I’m having technical difficulties.

In April, I started my last internship for my education.
It was one I did before during November, December and January but I had to re-do it because I got a 9/20 the first time, so I failed it.
I got a second chance however as some of you may remember.

My internship went great, only good comments, a lot of compliments, people that at first didn’t want me in their house eventually changed their minds and said I was excellent in my job.
All that appreciation made me feel so great!

On the 27th of June, I graduated as a (let’s call it nurse because I don’t know how to say it in English) nurse.

A little more than a week later, I started at my new job in a new nursing home.
I’ve been working there exactly one week today.

It’s hard work since everything is new and a bit chaotic, but I have a pretty amazing collegue who helps me whenever she can.

My love and I are still getting used to this new way of living.
Sometimes we don’t get to spend much time together, if I need to get up really early in the morning.

He’s currently living at my house as well since the rest of my family is on vacation.
It’s great living together. It’s perfect for us this way, since now we can get used to the fact that I won’t get to spend each weekend next to him anymore.
Last weekend I had to work as well and could only be with him in the evening…

And this Thursday I’m working from five ’till nine, so we won’t be able to have dinner together.
And since this Friday I have to get up early for work, we won’t get much time together

The good news is though, that Friday evening we get on a plane together.
Towards Spain, to visit my parents and brother for three days on the camping.
We’ll be sleeping in the tent close to our trailer.

I’m so looking forward to it.
My first family vacation with a boyfriend
and not just any boyfriend, but the love of my life.
No doubt about that.

We’re both excited about it.
And about my new job, since now we can finally start seaching for a place of our own.

So let the savings begin! ;)


Technical difficulties

Hey guys!

Sorry that its been so long, but my parents made me give my good laptop to my younger sister – long story-
And I got my old , crappy one back

Which is incapable of doing… Anything really

Which is why I can’t reach my blog
And haven’t been able to post the past months

I’m sending this quick message from my phone
But it’s not enough to keep my blog up the way it should.

I’m saving to get a new laptop as soon as possible
I’m hoping to be back online in two months, stop.

So bear with me as I try and get a new laptop as soon as possible
Before I throw the other one out the window

I love and miss you all

Talk soon!<3